đ§ The Psychology Behind Why We Ignore AI
Welcome to our latest newsletter.
This month, we look at:
Why people tune out when AI starts talking â and how to keep them listening.
How the way you present review stars can completely shift perception.
Why customers still follow your lead, even when thereâs no clear benefit.
And how sharing your struggles can connect more than polished perfection.
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Why Your Customers Still ObeyâEven When It Doesnât Pay
New research based on a 14,000-person experiment reveals that people often follow rulesâeven when thereâs no benefit, no consequence, and no oneâs watching (phys.org). The driving forces? Not fear of punishment, but:
Intrinsic respect for rulesâpeople believe rules are meaningful
Social expectationsâthey think others expect them to comply
For brands and experience designers, that insight flips assumptions. Audiences donât just react to incentives or benefitsâthey often follow paths out of internal or perceived external norms.
That means rules, prompts and structures in journeysâlike form formats, terms-and-conditions, password requirementsâarenât just friction: they can cue compliance, even loyalty.
But overdo them, and you strip away autonomy. Smart experience design uses just enough structure to guide good behaviourâwithout undermining trust.
Practical Business Takeouts:
Use predictable micro-rules to guide actions
Simple text prompts like âPlease review before submittingâ can nudge follow-throughâeven if no reward hinges on it.
Frame rules as shared values
Position guidelines as âcommunity normsâ (e.g. âHereâs how we treat feedbackâ) so audiences feel internal and social obligation.
Donât assume rule friction is bad friction
Some prompts help accountability: e.g. password requirements or submit confirmations are followed even without active benefit.
Balance structure and autonomy
Too many steps feel punitive. Keep prompts short and designed to frame âhelpful rulesâ rather than hurdles.
Use social expectation cues sparingly
Phrases like âMost users choose thisâŚâ or âOur members agreeâŚâ tap into perceived social validationâboosting participation.
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Photo: Eric McLean
How Struggle Sells â When You Show Just Enough
Sometimes, a bit of grit works better than polish. This study suggests that audiences can trust and engage more with stories that highlight effort, progress or challenge â rather than just smooth success or high status. Itâs not about oversharing failure or ditching professionalism. Itâs about adding a human edge.
Brands that include small signals of striving â a bumpy start, a learning curve, a humble detail â may come across as more grounded, more relatable, and more trustworthy. Especially in high-consideration categories, this kind of narrative honesty helps audiences connect. So while slick campaigns still have their place, itâs worth asking: where can we show the effort behind the outcome?
Showing how you got there might matter just as much as where you are now.
Practical Business Takeouts:
Test grit vs polish in messaging
Adding one authentic challenge or learning moment can make a sleek brand story feel more relatable.
Use progress language in copy
Phrases like âwe figured out,â âwe adapted,â or âwe improvedâ hint at credibility earned through effort â not just status.
Include âearly daysâ visuals in design
Think sketches, prototypes, timelines or even feedback quotes â subtle signs of development make stories stick.
Balance confidence with modesty
Avoid phrases that sound too finished or self-congratulatory. A touch of humility often builds more trust than bravado.
Show grit strategically in B2B
For enterprise sales or client trust-building, showing how youâve overcome complexity can help you stand out as credible, not just capable.
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Photo: Andrea Piacquadio
Why People Switch Off When AI Speaks,
Faster, better, cheaper? Yes â but at a cost to motivation. This study found that while GenAI improves the quality and speed of creative tasks, it also quietly drains peopleâs intrinsic motivation and sense of ownership.
When customers interact with AI-generated content, interfaces or suggestions, they might perform tasks more efficiently â but they can also feel more bored, less involved, and less emotionally invested. That changes the psychology of buying, subscribing, or engaging. Itâs the IKEA Effect in reverse: if AI does too much, people value the outcome less.
So if youâre using AI in your customer experience, make sure thereâs still room for agency. Ownership builds engagement. And without it, your message, brand or product might slip by unnoticed â however slick the interface.
Practical Business Takeouts:
Donât over-automate the journey
AI tools can speed things up â but too much ease strips away the effort needed to build value. Let users do something.
Design for co-creation, not completion
Let audiences make meaningful choices or edits, even in AI-assisted flows (e.g. customisation, copywriting, planning tools).
Frame the user as the author
Make AI the sidekick, not the star. âYou built this, with help from AIâ boosts perceived ownership and emotional payoff.
Use friction as a feature
Smart nudges or mini-decisions in AI flows (e.g. âChoose your toneâ, âPick your styleâ) turn passive users into active ones â and active users remember you.
Watch the boredom curve
If your GenAI interface solves everything instantly, test for post-use engagement. Do users come back? Or did the tool flatten their interest?
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Photo: Marcelo Chagas
Why Polite Questions Kill Honest Answers
If you want the truth, donât ask nicelyâask directly. A new study in Harvard Business Review shows that presumptive questions (the kind that assume something went wrong) are far more effective at getting honest answers than open or polite ones.
Instead of asking, âIs everything okay?â, try âWhat slowed things down?â This signals that youâre open to hearing the real answerâand makes people more likely to share it.
The way you frame a question changes what you learn. Soft phrasing often softens the truth. But when you ask with confident curiosity, people respond in kind.
Practical Business Takeouts:
Use informed framing
Ask âWhat held this back?â instead of âDid this work for you?â to invite more honest responses.
Make friction visible
Try âWhere did things slow down?â rather than âWas the experience smooth?â to surface useful detail.
Train people to expect honesty
Phrasing like âWhatâs still unclear?â or âWhatâs missing?â gives people permission to be candid.
Avoid yes/no dead-ends
Binary questions shut down feedback. Instead, ask what could be improved or changed.
Be clear, not pushy
Direct questions donât need to be harshâjust confident and specific.
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Photo: Sora Shimazaki
Why Stars Sell. And Numbers Donât
Consumers arenât just sensitive to what ratings sayâtheyâre influenced by how theyâre shown. New Cornell research reveals that a 3½âstar rating is perceived closer to a 4, while the same 3.5 written in numerals reads more like a 3.
Thatâs because our brains automatically âfill inâ partial star icons but drop the decimal focus in numbers. As small shifts in perceived rating can drive major increases in clicks, conversions, or bookings, this format effect isnât trivialâitâs persuasive (sciencedaily.com).
For anyone relying on reviews, customer scores or UI ratings, it shows that form is function. Present stars if you want to amplify perceived quality; choose numerals if you prefer precise honesty. Either way, format is a tactical lever in experience, trust and conversion design.
Practical business takeouts:
Amplify perceived ratings with stars
If your platform allows it (e.g. product listings, booking engines), use star iconsânot plain numbersâto nudge customers towards higher ratings.
Highlight partials visually
Design halfâstar indicators clearly; our brains auto-complete themâso 3½ becomes âalmost 4.â
Be transparent in analytics
Internally, track true averages. Externally, use stars for engagementâbut know your benchmarks.
Test formats in different touchpoints
Compare star vs numeral formats in emails, banners or UXâsmall format tweaks can yield outsized impact on click-through and trust.
Adapt the format according to pricing tiers
Presenting 4.5-star plan ratings makes them feel premium; a 4.5 numeric score feels exactâbut less indulgent.
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Photo: Towfiqu Barbhuiya
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