🧠 The Psychology of Wanting, Belonging and Being Wrong
Welcome to our latest newsletter.
This month, we look at:
When Forgotten Memories Come BackThe Power of What You Can't Have
Why Your Most Loyal Fans Are Most At Risk
The Problem With Proving People Wrong
Why Perfect Agreement Can Be A Bad Sign
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The Power of What You Can't Have
Something you can't buy shouldn't affect what you choose.
But it can.
Previous research has found that unavailable options can change people's preferences between the choices they can actually make.
Now researchers have found evidence that the effect may run surprisingly deep.
In a series of experiments with wild mice, they placed highly attractive food where it could be smelled, but not eaten. Simply having this unavailable reward nearby changed how the mice evaluated their real options, making them more willing to forage in riskier locations.
The researchers suggest that these "phantom decoys" provide information about what other opportunities might exist. In other words, we don't necessarily judge choices in isolation. What we can't have might change how we see what we can.
For businesses, that raises an intriguing possibility.
Customers may judge what they can buy partly by what they can see but can't buy.
Practical Business Takeouts:
Don't automatically hide sold-out options. An unavailable premium room, ticket or product may still provide useful context for evaluating what's left.
Show customers what sits above their choice. Even when the premium version isn't available, seeing it may change how customers perceive the value of the standard option.
Use availability as information. "Sold out", "fully booked" or "currently unavailable" doesn't necessarily mean an option has stopped influencing the decision.
Be careful when removing products from view. Taking an unavailable item off a website may simplify the choice, but it can also remove information customers were using to judge the remaining options.
Why Your Most Loyal Fans Are Most At Risk
Your most loyal customers should be the ones most likely to stick with you when something goes wrong.
But strong loyalty can create a different kind of vulnerability.
New research into group identity found that when people strongly identify with a group, bad behaviour by other members can feel more personally embarrassing.
Researchers asked sports fans about misconduct by players and fellow supporters. Those who felt ashamed by the behaviour were more likely to want to distance themselves from the group, repair its reputation or see consequences for whoever was responsible.
And these effects were stronger among people who identified most closely with the group.
The more something becomes part of our identity, the more its behaviour reflects on us.
For your biggest fans, being associated with your brand can say something about who they are.
Which means when your brand makes them look bad, they may have more at stake than anyone else.
Practical Business Takeouts:
Give people something to reject. If one person, decision or behaviour caused the problem, isolate it clearly. This allows loyal customers to condemn that rather than having to distance themselves from the whole brand.
Give people a way to repair. The research suggests shame can motivate people to restore their group's reputation. Channel that motivation: invite customers to support the corrective action, share the change or participate in something that demonstrates what the community really stands for.
Make consequences visible when someone crosses the line. If customers expect action, quietly dealing with the problem may leave the identity threat unresolved. Visible consequences show that the behaviour sits outside the group's norms.
Use other members to define what's normal. After bad behaviour by a customer, fan or ambassador, show that most members behave differently. Descriptive norms can stop one visible offender becoming representative of the whole community.
The Problem With Proving People Wrong
If someone believes something that's wrong, you might think that giving them the facts should help.
But there may be a problem.
Across four studies involving more than 2,000 people, researchers found that we aren't particularly bothered by people simply believing something different from us.
We're much more bothered when we think they're wrong.
The more confident people were that someone else's belief was incorrect, the more negatively they felt towards them, the more they wanted to avoid them and the less interested they were in having a relationship with them.
That creates an interesting challenge for businesses trying to change minds.
Proving that a customer is wrong can turn a difference of opinion into a conflict about who understands reality correctly.
Sometimes the most persuasive route may be to help people reach a different conclusion without making them feel that getting there requires admitting they were wrong.
Practical Business Takeouts:
Correct the belief without correcting the person. Instead of “You're paying too much”, try “You could save £420 by switching”. The information changes while the judgement about the customer's previous decision disappears.
Give people new information rather than telling them they're mistaken. “This tariff now works differently” gives customers a reason to update their view without requiring them to concede that their previous belief was wrong.
Use questions to reveal contradictions. Rather than stating the correction, ask something that encourages customers to discover it themselves: “Which do you think costs more over five years?” Self-generated conclusions can avoid a direct contest over who's right.
Separate facts from preferences. Don't present subjective choices as though there's one objectively correct answer. “Most efficient” can be factual. “Best” may depend on what the customer values.
Why Perfect Agreement Can Be A Bad Sign
If ten experts independently reach the same conclusion, you might think people would trust it more than if eight agreed and two didn't.
But perfect agreement isn't always the reassuring signal it appears to be.
Researchers used mathematical models to explore what happens when people make decisions using both their own judgement and the opinions of others.
More agreement generally meant a greater chance that the group was right.
But something strange happened.
For sufficiently difficult decisions, groups showing a little disagreement could actually be more trustworthy than those showing complete consensus.
Why? Because dissent provides evidence that people are still thinking independently. Perfect agreement might mean everyone independently reached the same conclusion. But it might also mean some simply followed everyone else.
For businesses, that's an intriguing idea.
Sometimes a little disagreement can make agreement more convincing.
Practical Business Takeouts:
Don't make every review look perfect. A wall of identical five-star reviews can provide less evidence of independent judgement than overwhelmingly positive feedback containing a few genuine criticisms.
Show what your product isn't good at. Acknowledging that your product isn't right for everyone can make the claims you do make feel more independently credible.
Show disagreement before the conclusion. When presenting an expert recommendation, don't automatically sanitise away the debate. Showing that alternatives were seriously considered can demonstrate that the final conclusion survived independent challenge.
Use genuine limitations as credibility signals. “Excellent for X, less suitable for Y” can be more convincing than “the perfect solution for everyone”. A little dissent within your own proposition can make the rest feel less manufactured.
😓 Tough business challenge? See if we can help. We probably can.
James, Patrick and Dan
We practically apply the science of the human mind for hard, commercial results
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